Holistic Life Solutions
  • THE HOLISTIC LIFE COACH
  • Our Philosophy
  • THE ARTICLES
  • The Contributors
  • Contact

All the News and Views for a Better You

Those Left Behind - Suicide Loss Survivors

19/10/2016

1 Comment

 
Picture
​The 10th September was World Suicide Prevention Day. Suicide is the single biggest killer of men under 45. The World Health Organization estimates that over 800,000 people die by suicide each year – that’s one person every 40 seconds.

​Up to 25 times as many again attempt suicide. 

Time does not heal, it makes a half-stitched scar that can be broken and again you feel grief as in its first hour.  – Elizabeth Jennings

The 10th September was World Suicide Prevention Day. Suicide is the single biggest killer of men under 45. The World Health Organization estimates that over 800,000 people die by suicide each year – that’s one person every 40 seconds. Up to 25 times as many again attempt suicide. The tragic ripple effect means that there are many, many more people who have been bereaved of suicide or have been close to someone who has tried to take his or her own life.
​
It is a catastrophe that 12 men die by their own hand every day in the UK. Sue Klebold writes in A Mother’s Reckoning on making plans for her son’s cremation:” …the only sound I could hear in my own head was a continuous, endless screech of agony and disbelief. This was my son, the person I had nurtured, protected, and loved with all my heart. The thought that I would never hear his voice or touch his face again took my breath away.” Her son, Dylan – along with his friend Eric – killed 12 students and a teacher before taking his own life in 1999 at Columbine High School, US. Another mother said after the death of her 19-year-old son by his own gunshot: “I feel like a mother animal. I keep searching for my baby.” Kay Redfield Jamison writes in her hugely authoritative study on understanding suicide, Night Falls Fast, that “Suicide is a death like no other and those who are left behind to struggle with it must confront a pain like no other.” She continues: “Death by suicide is not a gentle deathbed gathering: it rips apart lives and beliefs, and sets its survivors on a prolonged and devastating journey of agonizing questioning.” Sue Klebold writes: “…waking was the cruelest moment of the day – the spilt second where it was possible to believe it had all been a nightmare, the worst dream a person could possibly have.”
I have read extensively on this topic for the past 25 years, since my twin brother ended his own life. There is so much suffering by relatives and friends left behind after a suicide. The most devastating feeling felt by all is the one of guilt and the continuous questioning “why?”. Sue Klebold says:” The guilt one feels doesn’t fit in a room; it is so huge.” I met up with a mother only last week, whose daughter ended her own life this year. She added how hard it has been dealing with the burden of the stigma related to suicide in regard to family, friends and neighbours. Only a suicide-loss survivor fully understands the multitude of emotions linked to suicide. Forgiveness also has to be found towards oneself for the death of a child in this devastating way; self-blame is extremely painful to tackle. You might hear from people around you, asking if you can forgive your child for taking their own life. As a suicide-loss survivor, you know this is a question asked by someone who doesn’t understand the deep guilt felt by a parent.

My local friend, Wilma Davidson, published her seventh book this summer: Hello Spirit. It contains a very helpful chapter: All About Death – Suicide victims are healed. It was awarded book of the month by Take a Break’s Fate & Fortune Magazine. Wilma has also been interviewed by several magazines including Spirit & Destiny, October issue.

The clearest and most urgent message Sue Klebold gives is: “Suicide is preventable.” Likewise, Kay Redfield Jamison writes: “Most suicides, although by no means all, can be prevented.” Let us join hands and make clear to everyone that “it may be too late for the ones we have lost, but it may not be too late to save others."

Look to the living, love them, and hold on. - Douglas Dunn

The editor of this magazine, Amanda Sharman, and article author, Lis Horwich, are offering  a Facebook forum entitled The Depressive Optimist. The purpose of this forum is to discuss feelings about anxiety, depression and suicide. The Depressive Optimist.
​

Next month’s article will be entitled How to live on after a suicide loss.   
 
Lis Horwich

    Get in touch with Lis

Contact Lis
1 Comment
Thots Ohio link
25/4/2021 23:41:16

Love tthis

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    The Holistic Life Coach

     Holistic & Natural Solutions for Health and Wellbeing


      SIGN UP FOR EXCLUSIVE CONTENT!

    Submit




    Categories

    All
    Alexander Technique
    Alison Metcalfe
    Aliza Bloom Robinson
    Amanda Sharman
    Andy Tomlinson
    Angie Fisk
    Aromatherapy
    Astrology
    Bach Flower Remedies
    Back Pain
    Barbara Cox
    Barbara Saph
    Being Rock
    Bernie Mullins
    Bevis Moyan
    Bevis Moynan
    Body Image
    Bowen Technique
    Caroline Grant
    Charlotte Crook
    Christina Cherry
    Christmas
    Chris Woollams
    Comfort Eating
    Contributors
    Crystal Therapy
    Debbie Goodridge
    Depression
    DNA
    Doris Prugel Bennett
    Doris Prugel-Bennett
    Editorial
    Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT)
    Emotional Issues
    Emotional Stress
    Employee Wellbeing
    Energy Balance
    Energy Healing
    Fay Durrant
    Feldenkrais
    Flower Remedies
    Gill Taylor
    Goals
    Health Blueprint
    Hilary Cooper
    Holistic Coaching
    Homeopathy
    I Am
    Jane Watson
    Joy At Work
    Juicing
    Kellie Lucas
    Kinesiology
    Linda Anousta
    Lisa Elmore
    Lis Horwich
    Liz Shields
    Louise Hay
    Mandy Preece
    Meditation
    Mind Chi
    Natural Remedies
    Natural Skin Care
    Neuro Linguistic Programming
    NLP
    Non Toxic Lifestyle
    Nutrition
    Physical Activity
    Pierre Vuilleumier
    Pilates
    Power Of Thought
    Rainbow Eating
    Reconnective Healing
    Reena Kumarasingham
    Reflexology
    Reiki
    Self Care
    Self Healing
    Self Love
    Sleep
    Soul Whisperer
    Stress
    Suicide
    Tapping
    The C Word
    Tony Mills
    Touch For Health
    Vanda North
    Vitamins
    Warrior Woman
    Weight Management
    Which Therapy?
    Work Life Balance
    Work Wellbeing
    Yoga


    Archives

    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016


    RSS Feed

COOKIE POLICY

We use cookies on this site to help us improve your experience.  If you wish to understand fully how we use these,  click through for our 'cookie policy'.

PRIVACY POLICY

read the privacy policy here

disclaimer

All material on this website is provided for your information only and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction. 
No action or inaction should be taken based solely on the contents of this website; please consult your own health practitioner.
The information and opinions expressed by contributors here do not necessarily reflect the views of every contributor to Life Solutions. Life Solutions acknowledges occasional differences in opinion and welcomes the exchange of different viewpoints. 
The publisher is not responsible for errors or omissions. ​

Contact Us

Subscribe

Join our mailing list today!
Join Now
Photos from tsbl2000, CJS*64 "Man with a camera", zeevveez, James P. Mann, Theo Crazzolara, saiberiac, earlynovelsdatabase, DaveBleasdale, Paxson Woelber, Maria Eklind, anieto2k, davitydave, Infomastern, sandiegopersonalinjuryattorney, insatiablemunch, Smallworldspictures123, AndresRSaenz, Kool Cats Photography over 6 Million Views, SammyJayJay, h.koppdelaney, Pink Sherbet Photography, c3lsius_bb, Rob.Bertholf, Ian D. Keating, greger.ravik, FootMassagez, Eman Rus, igorputina, Ingere, FootMassagez, Photocapy, barnimages.com, wuestenigel, bekiweki13, dvanzuijlekom, Rod Raglin, One Way Stock, barnimages.com, spencer77, ell brown, Ajithpoison, marcoverch, Alan Light, perzonseowebbyra, yourbestdigs
  • THE HOLISTIC LIFE COACH
  • Our Philosophy
  • THE ARTICLES
  • The Contributors
  • Contact