Over the years, I’ve heard a number of people refer to and start accreditations in NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and I confess there was always a little natural curiosity. Mostly sceptical and suspicious! I’m a pretty intuitive person and always felt that I’d be better served following my own instincts. A close friend undertook the Practitioner course and I came to the realisation that everything she talked about resonated and the following is what I came to understand.
The dirty secret to NLP is that it’s nothing new, it merely postulates in a structured format what we are, intrinsically and of what we are capable. This is why all the theories and techniques resonated. I, we, use many of them without conscious thought every day because we have the inherent ability to extract the most genuine experience life has to offer through effective communication and personal belief. No one more than our own self has the power and drive to guide us through life, maximise the benefits and more than that, to heal ourselves emotionally as we encounter the inevitable challenges along the way.
Epiphany moment! Using NLP to understand my intuitive actions (processes) would improve my strength for myself and others through more effective understanding, control, communication, empathy and rapport.
In truth, I embarked on my NLP accreditations to facilitate a future in professional coaching. I discovered, quite unexpectedly, that it helped me to exponential degrees. I suspect many people experience various “A-ha” moments whilst studying NLP. I know I have!
How do we understand what’s involved to reap the benefits?
The foundations from which to start are pretty simple really.
Basically, we each have our own unique perception (map, if you will) of reality to which we refer to inform our position and direction. It has been created through our experiences, responses, language and beliefs. It is our view of the world, as we see it.
This concept is important. Have you got it?
Also understand that during the build, we will have deleted, generalised and distorted many of the inputs. Some of this will have been necessary and beneficial. Some may not.
Still with me?
Then really consider that we have all been through this process and each person believes their map is true, correct and genuine. To be clear, that is billions of unique human perspective maps across the world. Each of them influences an individual’s present and future interactions. And even if we think we’re saying the same thing as another person, it will mean something slightly different depending on their map. This is how confusion and misunderstanding reigns supreme! Unless we’re conscious of our differences in nuances, language, beliefs and principles – and let’s face it, most people are not – we assume people are deliberately obtuse if they don’t do what we think we’ve asked or understood to have agreed.
What now then?
Being conscious of these multiple realities will aid you in taking a mental step back and consider from which direction your peers, colleagues or family are coming. Understanding different perspectives will facilitate more effective and mutually beneficial interactions.
NLP is powerful because as individual’s we all have the capacity to be powerful. And NLP is the definition of us and the most successful application of our internal processes.
As a first step (I’m a great believer in little steps), from today, be mindful of your own map. Review it before deciding how to respond to any given situation and consider what the other person’s map may dictate for them. Proceed with care and insight.
Helpful Hint: If you don’t know where to start, the best approach is to ask questions to give you both a better understanding of each other.
It’s really that simple to start making a difference today. Be mindful, be aware.
The challenge is in remembering to put this into practice. As I said at the beginning; we know all this already. We have mostly forgotten to practice it and you know what they say, practice makes perfect!
Check out my article next month which will build on the NLP fundamentals. In the meantime, if you’d like more information or advice on understanding your map or further NLP concepts and techniques, please get in touch as I’d love to hear from you.
The Holistic Life Coach
Holistic & Natural Solutions for Health and Wellbeing